When I was in grade seven I had a boyfriend who was in grade six.
He would carve "Danny loves Robinhood" in my desk when he had class in my room.
My teacher would tell me to tell my boyfriend to stop carving in my desk.
The girl that sat in front of me, Lisa, was very nice and would laugh about Danny and his silly but sweet carvings.
Danny would ride the bus home with me and bought me shoelaces with hearts on them.
He would call my house, and my dad would answer, and I would say I don't know anyone named Danny because I didn't want my parents to know I had a boyfriend.
Then Danny moved away (nothing to do with me pretending not to know him).
He moved back in grade ten.
We became friends again and we all hung out being silly teenagers.
Remember Lisa from way back in grade seven?
She ended up getting together with Danny in grade eleven.
She got pregnant with Danny's baby.
Danny had a motorcycle.
One day in late fall I was driving home from school.
At the top of my street there were police cars, and ambulances, and firetrucks.
I wanted to pull over to see what was happening.
But something told me no.
It told me no so strongly I drove straight home without stopping.
Two hours later my friend called to tell me Danny had died.
He died at the top of my street, his motorcycle slid right under a car.
Lisa was at the funeral, eight months pregnant.
Tuesday would be Danny's birthday.
And his son never got to meet him.
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Saturday, January 21, 2006
Hey all you Canadians with breasts check this out!
Breast of Canada Photo Contest
Thanks to one of my favourite photographers Jeff Phillips for the link.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Half-Nekkid Thursday
I had a few Stellas and decided to cut my own hair for HNT.
I haven't had bangs for TEN years.
And in case you don't care about my bangs, here's a more nekkid photo...
If you want to play HNT and you don't know what it is, click the red button in the sidebar.
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
| Your Personality Is |
You are both grounded and flexible. You adapt well to new situations.
|
I mean come on, it's like my brain has been bugged when I take these quizzes.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Here is my own set of rules for 2006. Pay attention.
New Rule: Stop acting like being male makes you a better poker player, commercial real estate agent or chef. It's not true. All it makes you is hairier and more likely to hump stuff.
New Rule: Keep your piece of crap car out of my lane.
New Rule: If you have a really bad hacking cough and fever stay the fuck home.
New Rule: Try not to have your cell phone ringer on full blast...the rest of us don't need to hear your favourite gay song every time your only friend calls you.
New Rule: Just because you are famous doesn't mean you are smart. Stop sharing your words of wisdom with us and just act or smile or whatever it is you do.
New Rule: Don't call it the special of the day on the menu, call it what it really is, the stuff that you are trying to get rid of before it goes bad.
New Rule: Have a point. And get to it. I don't need to hear the complete functioning of your synapses from start to finish. Less is more. Unless it's money or beer.
New Rule: Stop acting like being male makes you a better poker player, commercial real estate agent or chef. It's not true. All it makes you is hairier and more likely to hump stuff.
New Rule: Keep your piece of crap car out of my lane.
New Rule: If you have a really bad hacking cough and fever stay the fuck home.
New Rule: Try not to have your cell phone ringer on full blast...the rest of us don't need to hear your favourite gay song every time your only friend calls you.
New Rule: Just because you are famous doesn't mean you are smart. Stop sharing your words of wisdom with us and just act or smile or whatever it is you do.
New Rule: Don't call it the special of the day on the menu, call it what it really is, the stuff that you are trying to get rid of before it goes bad.
New Rule: Have a point. And get to it. I don't need to hear the complete functioning of your synapses from start to finish. Less is more. Unless it's money or beer.
Monday, January 16, 2006
NEW RULES for 2006 (George Carlin)
New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates.com. There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them. Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain?
New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastards.
New Rule: If you need to shave and you still collect baseball cards, you're a dope. If you're a kid, the cards are keepsakes of your idols. If you're a grown man , they're pictures of men.
New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.
New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water? Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.
New Rule: Stop f***ing with old people. Target is introducing a redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time grandpa figures out how to open it, his ass will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.
New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're a huge asshole.
New Rule: I'm not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN number, pressing "Enter," verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don't want cash back, and pressing "Enter" again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.
New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.
New Rule: I don't need a bigger mega M&M. If I'm extra hungry for M&Ms, I'll go nuts and eat two.
New Rule: If you're going to insist on making movies based on crappy, old television shows, then you have to give everyone in the Cineplex a remote so we can see what's playing on the other screens. Let's remember the reason something was a television show in the first place is that the idea wasn't good enough to be a movie.
New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab. Picking out the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting.
New Rule: and this one is long overdue: No more bathroom attendants. After I zip up, some guy is offering me a towel and a mint like I just had sex with George Michael. I can't even tell if he's supposed to be there, or just some freak with a fetish. I don't want to be on your webcam, dude. I just want to wash my hands.
New Rule: When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to know in months. "27 Months." "He's two," will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.
Stolen from Countess
New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates.com. There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them. Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain?
New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastards.
New Rule: If you need to shave and you still collect baseball cards, you're a dope. If you're a kid, the cards are keepsakes of your idols. If you're a grown man , they're pictures of men.
New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.
New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored water is called a soft drink. You want flavored water? Pour some scotch over ice and let it melt. That's your flavored water.
New Rule: Stop f***ing with old people. Target is introducing a redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label. And the top is now the bottom. And by the time grandpa figures out how to open it, his ass will be in the morgue. Congratulations, Target, you just solved the Social Security crisis.
New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf grande half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet," ooh, you're a huge asshole.
New Rule: I'm not the cashier! By the time I look up from sliding my card, entering my PIN number, pressing "Enter," verifying the amount, deciding, no, I don't want cash back, and pressing "Enter" again, the kid who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.
New Rule: Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high.
New Rule: I don't need a bigger mega M&M. If I'm extra hungry for M&Ms, I'll go nuts and eat two.
New Rule: If you're going to insist on making movies based on crappy, old television shows, then you have to give everyone in the Cineplex a remote so we can see what's playing on the other screens. Let's remember the reason something was a television show in the first place is that the idea wasn't good enough to be a movie.
New Rule: No more gift registries. You know, it used to be just for weddings. Now it's for babies and new homes and graduations from rehab. Picking out the stuff you want and having other people buy it for you isn't gift giving, it's the white people version of looting.
New Rule: and this one is long overdue: No more bathroom attendants. After I zip up, some guy is offering me a towel and a mint like I just had sex with George Michael. I can't even tell if he's supposed to be there, or just some freak with a fetish. I don't want to be on your webcam, dude. I just want to wash my hands.
New Rule: When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to know in months. "27 Months." "He's two," will do just fine. He's not a cheese. And I didn't really care in the first place.
Stolen from Countess
Yoda I am
I have realized that I write like Yoda.I'm not sure if I speak the same way...but keep you posted I will.
Sunday, January 15, 2006
This is my friend Lysa:
Lysa is a newish blogger, but I've known her since we were eleven or twelve.
This is her first Half-Nekkid Thursday picture:
That is a sunburn. Can you imagine?? Click here to say hi and encourage her to share more crazy pictures with us.
Lysa is a newish blogger, but I've known her since we were eleven or twelve.This is her first Half-Nekkid Thursday picture:
That is a sunburn. Can you imagine?? Click here to say hi and encourage her to share more crazy pictures with us. Friday, January 13, 2006
Don't worry, he didn't cross your path, he's just laying there all cute and stuff on your monitor. And besides look how tiny he is.
But just to be safe maybe you should throw some salt over your left shoulder and jump around on one foot for a bit.
I got interviewed by Zona Boy...this shit is starting to go to my head yo. Nah.
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Half-Nekkid Thursday
Wait a second. Pan out.
Tricky cleavage.It's very hard to take a picture of your own back cleavage btw.
Hey Aughra, this one has got to be bright enough for you to see right?
Click the red button in the sidebar to join HNT.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
There's a new blog about Canadian Women Bloggers and today I got a really nice review that I would like to share with you (with my comments in brackets).
Robin is a veteran of the blog. (I am old for a head of lettuce and young for a mighty oak tree - it's amazing how that saying applies to so many things.)
As far as I know, she has blogged for a few years now. (A year and a half)
She seems to have a fairly large readership. (Don't worry he's not calling you fat, he's saying there are a lot of you)
Robin keeps it simple by using relatively short, often thought provoking posts. (That's a nice way of saying I'm a bit slow and odd)
She doesn't go out of her way to post because she feels she has to, she blogs when she feels the urge to. (That's pretty much my m.o. for everything)
From reading Robin's blog, I get the feeling she is the same in person to her closest friends as she is to her on-line blog friends, a true Capricorn. LOYAL! (Well now's the time to speak up all you lurking real friends of mine who never comment. Of course that's only if you were gonna say nice stuff)
Robin is creative with her site as she changes her template from time to time and makes it unique to her. (Well thank-you.)
Robin has flare with her camera as she shows that while participating in a blog phenomenon called Half Nekkid Thursday. (Thank-you again. I love taking pictures. When I grow up I want to be a photographer or a caterpillar.)
If you haven't read about this before, you should go to her site and find out what it is all about. (It's about everybody getting half naked and taking pictures...good times, good times.)
An interview with Robin is definitely pending as I think she would have a lot of valuable insight to us new bloggers as to what blogging used to be versus what it is now. (Valuable insight? From the slow, odd girl? I bet you are on the edge of your seats. I kid, I kid...I'm sure I've got lots of fascinating things to say.)
Robin is a veteran of the blog. (I am old for a head of lettuce and young for a mighty oak tree - it's amazing how that saying applies to so many things.)
As far as I know, she has blogged for a few years now. (A year and a half)
She seems to have a fairly large readership. (Don't worry he's not calling you fat, he's saying there are a lot of you)
Robin keeps it simple by using relatively short, often thought provoking posts. (That's a nice way of saying I'm a bit slow and odd)
She doesn't go out of her way to post because she feels she has to, she blogs when she feels the urge to. (That's pretty much my m.o. for everything)
From reading Robin's blog, I get the feeling she is the same in person to her closest friends as she is to her on-line blog friends, a true Capricorn. LOYAL! (Well now's the time to speak up all you lurking real friends of mine who never comment. Of course that's only if you were gonna say nice stuff)
Robin is creative with her site as she changes her template from time to time and makes it unique to her. (Well thank-you.)
Robin has flare with her camera as she shows that while participating in a blog phenomenon called Half Nekkid Thursday. (Thank-you again. I love taking pictures. When I grow up I want to be a photographer or a caterpillar.)
If you haven't read about this before, you should go to her site and find out what it is all about. (It's about everybody getting half naked and taking pictures...good times, good times.)
An interview with Robin is definitely pending as I think she would have a lot of valuable insight to us new bloggers as to what blogging used to be versus what it is now. (Valuable insight? From the slow, odd girl? I bet you are on the edge of your seats. I kid, I kid...I'm sure I've got lots of fascinating things to say.)
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
What the hell happened to my computer chair? It used to glide across the floor so nicely, now it drags and sticks. Damn.
Why can't I sleep at night?
Why do you always have to say good morning to me? I don't think mornings in an office are good. If we were on a beach or something, good morning might make more sense.
My parents are so sad. Their cat Rocky died today. He was so sweet. I'm sad too.
There's a ghost in my house that keeps turning the heat up. But I don't think it's a mean ghost, maybe just a cold ghost.
Sometimes I can't stop thinking about silly things.
I'm sorry if I've ever hurt you...I never meant to.
I need a new washer it squeaks, I need a new dryer it overheats, I need a new refrigerator it buzzes.
Thank you for your support and love, it means more to me than you will ever know.
I hope I've helped you in some small way too.
Sometimes I want to be angry, to make sense of the senselessness of things, but anger doesn't help.
I like the name Arielle. I think I will name my daughter that.
Why can't I sleep at night?
Why do you always have to say good morning to me? I don't think mornings in an office are good. If we were on a beach or something, good morning might make more sense.
My parents are so sad. Their cat Rocky died today. He was so sweet. I'm sad too.
There's a ghost in my house that keeps turning the heat up. But I don't think it's a mean ghost, maybe just a cold ghost.
Sometimes I can't stop thinking about silly things.
I'm sorry if I've ever hurt you...I never meant to.
I need a new washer it squeaks, I need a new dryer it overheats, I need a new refrigerator it buzzes.
Thank you for your support and love, it means more to me than you will ever know.
I hope I've helped you in some small way too.
Sometimes I want to be angry, to make sense of the senselessness of things, but anger doesn't help.
I like the name Arielle. I think I will name my daughter that.
Monday, January 09, 2006
Friday, January 06, 2006
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Half-Nekkid Thursday
Thank you all for your birthday wishes, you guys are the BEST. I am still enjoying the last few hours of my birthday and here's a shot taken after a few bottles of birthday wine. Love you guys.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Half-Nekkid Thursday - 2005 finale
Tonight Osbasso has asked us to pick our favourite HNT as our goodbye to 2005.
I picked two. Is that selfish?
I picked two. Is that selfish?
Happy New Year my pretties...
Monday, December 26, 2005
So my dad tells us at Christmas that he went to the doctor for one of those regular check-up things and the doctor says "Oh you've got dry skin on your face. I have a great cream that you could use to clear that up." (Maybe if you were two inches from my dad's face you could tell that he had some dry skin, but to look at him from a normal distance you wouldn't notice it at all.) Anyway, his doctor prescribed FOUR tubes of it. My dad goes to the pharmacy and hands them the prescription and says I think two should be fine for now. AFTER the prescription is filled they give him the sheet with the side effects:
The most common side effect at the site of application is burning or a feeling of warmth. The burning feeling is usually mild or moderate, occurring in the first 5 days of treatment, and the burning usually clears up in a few days. See your doctor if an application site reaction is severe or persists for more than 1 week. Other common side effects include headache, nasopharyngitis (common cold/stuffy nose), influenza, pharyngitis (sore throat), fever, viral infection, and cough. Some people may get herpes skin infections (like cold sores, chicken pox, or shingles), warts, or swollen lymph nodes (glands). This medication also has a statistically signifigant increase in the risk of lymphoma and follicular cell adenoma.
The most common side effect at the site of application is burning or a feeling of warmth. The burning feeling is usually mild or moderate, occurring in the first 5 days of treatment, and the burning usually clears up in a few days. See your doctor if an application site reaction is severe or persists for more than 1 week. Other common side effects include headache, nasopharyngitis (common cold/stuffy nose), influenza, pharyngitis (sore throat), fever, viral infection, and cough. Some people may get herpes skin infections (like cold sores, chicken pox, or shingles), warts, or swollen lymph nodes (glands). This medication also has a statistically signifigant increase in the risk of lymphoma and follicular cell adenoma.
A statistically signifigant increase in the risk of lymphoma????
I said pardon????
After this little tidbit of information my dad goes back to the pharmacist and says that he wants NOTHING to do with this cream (he has not opened either of the packages by the way). The pharmacist says that there are no returns on medications.
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Saturday, December 24, 2005
I know you've all been naughty so don't even try and pretend otherwise. Santa and I see all. Okay maybe it's just Santa that sees that stuff, but I sense the naughtiness.
Have a Merry Christmas. I will be back...but you won't know when...so stay on your toes.
Oh and a few more things...Christmas is funny. You hang around with your family and you realize that some things are just genetic, therefore not your fault. Take my love of the band Tatu..."Not Gonna Get Us"...my brother LOVES that song too, and he's not even gay (not that there is anything wrong with that.)
Also, last year I posted this and the last paragraph really could keep you out of all sorts of trouble.
Thursday, December 22, 2005
Half-Nekkid Thursday
Today is a special installment of HNT. Our mission was to pick 3 HNTers and tell everybody what we would get them for Christmas.Here you go:
I would buy Kalani a Paul doll 'cause he's all hot and she's all cool (and hot), and she has mentioned she likes kiwi.
I would buy Tess another one of these outfits...for obvious reasons.
and...
I would buy Ajax Paul a bus ticket to my town. Greyhound even, nothing's too good for Ajax Paul. (Have you seen his body??)
Click the red button in my sidebar if you are the only person on the internet who hasn't heard of HNT.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
You know how everybody loves to Google? Well, I am thinking that if I put down some long lost friend's names and they Google themselves they'll find me. Fun huh?
Okay so here we go:
Damian McGovern - What the hell happened to you? The last time I saw you, you were wearing a hospital bracelet and holding a six pack of Canadian(that's beer for my Mexican and European friends).
Kim Howland - You are probably married now because you were so pretty and nice. Not that all pretty, nice people are married, no way.
Michael Stanley - You were such a great boyfriend, and I was SO high maintenance. I'm sorry, I was only 21, I'm much nicer now. Really.
Johnny Depp - Okay we've never met, but I feel like we should have, and if you've Googled yourself and found my little blog then there is a god. Hi. Do you like stuff?
Santa - What's up? One lousy winning lottery ticket is all I ask for every year, why you gotta be hating dude?
Okay so here we go:
Damian McGovern - What the hell happened to you? The last time I saw you, you were wearing a hospital bracelet and holding a six pack of Canadian(that's beer for my Mexican and European friends).
Kim Howland - You are probably married now because you were so pretty and nice. Not that all pretty, nice people are married, no way.
Michael Stanley - You were such a great boyfriend, and I was SO high maintenance. I'm sorry, I was only 21, I'm much nicer now. Really.
Johnny Depp - Okay we've never met, but I feel like we should have, and if you've Googled yourself and found my little blog then there is a god. Hi. Do you like stuff?
Santa - What's up? One lousy winning lottery ticket is all I ask for every year, why you gotta be hating dude?
Monday, December 19, 2005
A Christmas Story
Idiot: How many gift bags you have?
Us: Eight
Idiot: Ten?
Us: No, eight.
Idiot gives a look like she doesn't believe us and motions for us to hand her the bags which she counts and says nothing.
Me: Eight right?
Idiot: Yes eight.
Why in hell's name didn't you just count the bags yourself in the first place instead of playing that little time wasting, call your customers liars game? FAAAAAAAAHK.
Us: Eight
Idiot: Ten?
Us: No, eight.
Idiot gives a look like she doesn't believe us and motions for us to hand her the bags which she counts and says nothing.
Me: Eight right?
Idiot: Yes eight.
Why in hell's name didn't you just count the bags yourself in the first place instead of playing that little time wasting, call your customers liars game? FAAAAAAAAHK.
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Half Nekkid Thursday
Okay I went to see King Kong tonight and didn't take any pictures so Damien's awesome caricature above is my HNT for today. I look EXACTLY like that in a bikini. Yep. I'm not lying.
If you want some real nudity you can go see Ty (I'm talking REALLY nude so don't click this if you are at work or something)
Happy HNT.
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
I am a very spoiled blogger. First Paul from Ajax made me a video...and now my buddy Damien has done a caricature of me. Actually he made two of them (the other one is wearing a bikini) so I'm going to add it to my HNT tomorrow. Thank you so much Damien. You are so talented, and you made me look all hot and stuff.
Also, my mother and I went shopping today and filled a huge hamper with adorable little clothes and toys for Christmas for a two and a half year old girl who is in need. Nothing is more fulfilling. I feel stupid for not liking Christmas much until now.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Sunday, December 11, 2005
Can anybody tell me the end of the limerick "There once was a girl from Nantucket"? I swear I've only ever heard the first line. Maybe it only has one line. Really I'm serious, I need to know.
Does anyone know if those Lindor chocolates have crack cocaine in them? There's gotta be something. I don't even eat a lot of chocolate (I prefer cheeseburgers) but if you put a bowl of those things in front of me I would eat them until I exploded.
Ty the eagle has landed.
And one more thing. Do you ever think about parallel blogging circles? Where there's another you, and another me, and another one of all of our favourite bloggers?
I bet we're better.
Does anyone know if those Lindor chocolates have crack cocaine in them? There's gotta be something. I don't even eat a lot of chocolate (I prefer cheeseburgers) but if you put a bowl of those things in front of me I would eat them until I exploded.
Ty the eagle has landed.
And one more thing. Do you ever think about parallel blogging circles? Where there's another you, and another me, and another one of all of our favourite bloggers?
I bet we're better.
Friday, December 09, 2005
I want to take a streetcar downtown
Read Henry Miller and wander around
And drink some Guinness from a tin
'Cause my U.I. cheque has just come in
Ah, where you been... because
Everything is coming up rosy and grey
Ah, the wind is cold but the smell of snow warms me today
And your smile is fine and it's just like mine and it won't go away, 'cause
Everything is rosy and grey
You've been under my skin for more than eight years
It's been eight years of laughter and eight years of tears
And I don't know what the future can hold, or will do, for me and you
But I'm a much better man for having known you
Yeah, you know that's true
Well, I've been told that there's a sucker born every day
Well, I wonder who, yeah, I wonder who
Maybe the one who doesn't realize there's a thousand shades of grey
'Cause I know that's true, yes I do, I know that's true
How about you?
Well, they're picking up trash and they're putting down roads
And they're brokering stocks, the class-struggle explodes
And I'll play this guitar just the best that I can
Well, maybe I'm not and maybe I am
Who gives a damn?
Well, I've kissed you in France and I've kissed you in Spain
And I've kissed you in places I'd better not name
And I've seen the sun go down on Sacre Coeur
But I like it much better going down on you
Ah, you know that's true
The Lowest of the Low
Read Henry Miller and wander around
And drink some Guinness from a tin
'Cause my U.I. cheque has just come in
Ah, where you been... because
Everything is coming up rosy and grey
Ah, the wind is cold but the smell of snow warms me today
And your smile is fine and it's just like mine and it won't go away, 'cause
Everything is rosy and grey
You've been under my skin for more than eight years
It's been eight years of laughter and eight years of tears
And I don't know what the future can hold, or will do, for me and you
But I'm a much better man for having known you
Yeah, you know that's true
Well, I've been told that there's a sucker born every day
Well, I wonder who, yeah, I wonder who
Maybe the one who doesn't realize there's a thousand shades of grey
'Cause I know that's true, yes I do, I know that's true
How about you?
Well, they're picking up trash and they're putting down roads
And they're brokering stocks, the class-struggle explodes
And I'll play this guitar just the best that I can
Well, maybe I'm not and maybe I am
Who gives a damn?
Well, I've kissed you in France and I've kissed you in Spain
And I've kissed you in places I'd better not name
And I've seen the sun go down on Sacre Coeur
But I like it much better going down on you
Ah, you know that's true
The Lowest of the Low
Thursday, December 08, 2005
Half Nekkid Thursday
It's not the soft pretzel but it's close. Click the red button in the sidebar if you would like to play. Wednesday, December 07, 2005
I've been infected by Greek Chickie.
Here are the directions: Write 5 random facts about yourself, and then list the names of 5 people whom you in turn infect.
1...I am claustrophobic
2...If I spill salt I throw it over my left shoulder
3...I once got my foot caught in the spikes of a bicycle wheel and it had to be cut out
4...I once saw a UFO - and I'm talking spaceship, not "it could have been a plane"
5...I won't get my hair cut at a place where they charge women more than men
I'm not going to infect anybody, but feel free to infect yourself.
Here are the directions: Write 5 random facts about yourself, and then list the names of 5 people whom you in turn infect.
1...I am claustrophobic
2...If I spill salt I throw it over my left shoulder
3...I once got my foot caught in the spikes of a bicycle wheel and it had to be cut out
4...I once saw a UFO - and I'm talking spaceship, not "it could have been a plane"
5...I won't get my hair cut at a place where they charge women more than men
I'm not going to infect anybody, but feel free to infect yourself.
Day 2 - Vancouver Blizzard 2005 - Revenge of the Commuters
Chilled Vancouver commuters faced their second day of winter hell today,as an additional ¼ centimeter of the peculiar white stuff fell, bringing the lower mainland to its knees and causing millions of dollars worth of damage to the marijuana crops. Scientists suspect that the substance is some form of frozen water particles and experts from Saskatchewan are being flown in. With temperatures dipping to the almost but not quite near zero mark, Vancouverites were warned to double insulate their lattes before venturing out.
Vancouver police recommended that people stay inside except for emergencies, such as running out of espresso or biscotti to see them through Vancouver's most terrible storm to date. The local Canadian Tire reported that they had completely sold out of fur-lined sandals.
Drivers were cautioned to put their convertible tops up, and several have been shocked to learn that their SUV's actually have four wheel drive, although most have no idea how to use it.
Weary commuters faced soggy sushi, and the threat of frozen breast implants. Although Dr. John Blatherwick, of the Coastal Health Authority reassured everyone that most breast implants were perfectly safe to 25 below, down-filled bras are flying off the shelves at Mountain Equipment Co-op.
"The government has to do something," snarled an angry Trevor Warburton. "I didn't pay $540,000 for my one bedroom condo so I could sit around and be treated like someone from Toronto."
Chilled Vancouver commuters faced their second day of winter hell today,as an additional ¼ centimeter of the peculiar white stuff fell, bringing the lower mainland to its knees and causing millions of dollars worth of damage to the marijuana crops. Scientists suspect that the substance is some form of frozen water particles and experts from Saskatchewan are being flown in. With temperatures dipping to the almost but not quite near zero mark, Vancouverites were warned to double insulate their lattes before venturing out.
Vancouver police recommended that people stay inside except for emergencies, such as running out of espresso or biscotti to see them through Vancouver's most terrible storm to date. The local Canadian Tire reported that they had completely sold out of fur-lined sandals.
Drivers were cautioned to put their convertible tops up, and several have been shocked to learn that their SUV's actually have four wheel drive, although most have no idea how to use it.
Weary commuters faced soggy sushi, and the threat of frozen breast implants. Although Dr. John Blatherwick, of the Coastal Health Authority reassured everyone that most breast implants were perfectly safe to 25 below, down-filled bras are flying off the shelves at Mountain Equipment Co-op.
"The government has to do something," snarled an angry Trevor Warburton. "I didn't pay $540,000 for my one bedroom condo so I could sit around and be treated like someone from Toronto."
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
I hate using hand cream because no matter what kind I use my hands end up all greasy and slippery like I've just rubbed them in butter.
Why do people who are going EXACTLY the same speed on the highway drive BESIDE eachother?
I don’t know where I’m going
But, I sure know where I’ve been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
And I’ve made up my mind,
I ain’t wasting no more time
But, here I go again
Here I go again
Though I keep searching for an answer,
I never seem to find what I’m looking for
Oh lord, I pray
You give me strength to carry on,
Cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams
And here I go again on my own
Going down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time
I’m just another heart in need of rescue,
Waiting on love’s sweet charity
And I’m gonna hold on
For the rest of my days,
cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams
And here I go again on my own
Going down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time
I wrote that. Okay no I didn't, Whitesnake did. But I could have.
Why do people who are going EXACTLY the same speed on the highway drive BESIDE eachother?
I don’t know where I’m going
But, I sure know where I’ve been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
And I’ve made up my mind,
I ain’t wasting no more time
But, here I go again
Here I go again
Though I keep searching for an answer,
I never seem to find what I’m looking for
Oh lord, I pray
You give me strength to carry on,
Cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams
And here I go again on my own
Going down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time
I’m just another heart in need of rescue,
Waiting on love’s sweet charity
And I’m gonna hold on
For the rest of my days,
cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams
And here I go again on my own
Going down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
And I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time
I wrote that. Okay no I didn't, Whitesnake did. But I could have.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Dear former owners of my house,What the hell did you put the wallpaper border on with in the bathroom? Krazy Glue? Do you know how long it has taken to remove? I think it would have been faster to take the walls out.
Also who picked that pattern? Your great Grandmother? I mean, who under the age of 90 puts up a dark green border with pink roses and blue ribbons?
I guess you thought that lovely dusty rose colour was the perfect backdrop. Gah.
Dear Retailer,
Please stop selling Krazy Glue to morons.
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